I felt this an important post to write and it is one that will get updated. The nes that I would ony need radiotherapy not chemotherapy was news I received happily. I didn’t really know what it would do to my body but what I did know was it would only deal with my defective boob and not attack my whole body, in the way that chemo threatens your immune system.
But I’m still learning as I go.
DAY 1 – I was taken to a consultation room by a nurse. We had a chat about radiotherapy and its side effects. Intererestingly she told me people still dont understand the difference and think its the same as chemo. Nonetheless we talked about the fatigue it could cause – though less likely in someone with a good level of fitness like me ( trust me I dont feel in peak health right now as I’m fairly sure I’ve piled on a stone in weight) – and also about the sore itchy “sunburned” skin and dmage to nerve endings. This could peak at 3 weeks – a mere stroll in the park comapred to chemo but still daunting just as I am beginning to feel healed. She explains about the radiotherapy machine, what it will do and how the staff will leave but watch from a camera.
Treatment again, a walk in the park. I met the lovely E and his team. E is a very jovial Nigerian who joked with me and quickly put me at my ease. It took a few minutes to set me up. A little adjustment on their part with me having to relax into it and let them move me without my assistance – that was difficult.
The machine itself, reminds me of the starship enterprise and it does “fly around” you as you lie as frozen as you can. It whirrs a little and clicks but your 4 or 5 minutes is over in well, 4 or 5 minutes. I never once felt vulnerable. I have felt more vulnerable waiting for some of my pre surgery treatments.
I felt fine. I did hit a wall at 8pm and felt suddently very tired. I was also grumpy. I don’t know if it was the treatment or whether the Anastrolzole is doing its job and I’m now suffering from a lack of Oestrogen. A slight headache which may just be down to the bright lights or the stress of the day and my boob turned slightly pink. I cant feel anything unusual in my boob.
DAY2
Any pinkness subsided overnight which seems promising. The hardest part of he session yesterday was being put into the right position and seemed much easier today. E greeted me and teased me a littlr and was assisted by two trainees. Attempted an afternoon nap and couldnt snooze but did have a very relaxed afternoon. I felt fine all day but seem to be a little swollen.
DAY3
I was in and out in a flash. E looked after me again. You can tell a natural smile from eyes, I hoped he could tell I was more relaxed. No issues today just a little swollen again.
DAY4/5
Its the weekend so I get two days off. I have remained slightly pink. I get occassional but minimal itchyness nothing like sunburn. Ive started to feel a few internal twinges that I assume to be my nerve endings. A few grumps again today this is more likely to be the Anastrozole I guess.
DAY6
The lovely E greeting me and straightened the bell. “You know about this?” he enquired in his Nigerian jovial tones. I told him I expected him to polish it for me. We played out our regular joke about me forgetting my DOB and he threatened to make me stand outside for two hours. I am a little sore now internally. It feels as if my surgery wounds are reversing the healing process. My boob is sore when I squish it e.g. bending over to tie my laces, but it is a mnor thing and doesnt require painkillers. I will ask E to take my pic tomorrow. Ive been wondering what happens I’m slightly anxious about stepping out and no one being there to take it.
I mentionned my eye to E, its been very sore for a few days, I thought it was a Stye growing but its never appeared. Instead my eye is bloodshot and I think I can see a small lump on my eyeball. I dont think its related at all. E kindly takes a quick look and I go to the docs who confirms its conjunctivitis. I get drops. At least I dont have to pay the presecription fee now. You have to grab what positives there are.
DAY7
My last day and there is no E to greet me. My heart sinks as I will have to deal with the bell situation. The lovely man with throat cancer chats in the waiting area. He has to wear a restrictive mask during therapy. I consider myself lucky. E’s colleage is equally nice. He tells me my symptoms are likely to peak at two weeks. “Joy” I say internally but there is no going back. But at least my eye feels a little better today. I leave some chocolates for the team and ask if he’d take the photo. He does and video too.
I give that bell all I’ve got and everyone in the waiting area wishes me well. There are conflicting opinions about whether or not the bell is a good idea. There are concerns about how it effects pallative care patients but everyone seemed genuinely happy for me.
My hospital treatment ends here. It a strange slighly empty feeling. I have a telephone consutation with my Oncologist and a bone density scan to face. Plus my tablets for 10 years and annual mammograms, but I’m officially clear of cancer. Its an emotional moment and I’m tearful as I head back to Brett.
Ring this bell
Three times well
Its toll to clearly say,
My treatment’s done
This course is run
And I am on my way!
— Irve Le Moyne
DAY10
There’s really been nothing to report. I’m still sore and twinging but no worse really. Ive a pink area under my boob so Im not wearing a bra unless I have to go out. Ive been to the dentist today and I really think it better to keep things under control. Oh and my eye is still red but the soreness is easing.
Carolyn Trafford is a Creative Life Coach, supporting others in reaching their own goals in a creative way sine 2010. Author of “Don’t Just Dream It – Achieve It!” (A great way to kickstart those goals). This interactive book is available from her online shop: https://carolyntraffordart.ecwid.com/Dont-Just-Dream-It-Achieve-It-Book-p196854491) . She was diagnosed with Breast Cancer on the 20th September 2021 following her first routine screening with the NHS at 51.
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